Miss Misanthropist

Writing With Myself

My Interview With Mercedes Carerra

I'm very lucky that I was able to interview the lovely Mercedes Carrera for my website (and there should be a youtube interview soon to come, a few weeks). Mercedes is an adult film star who is also big in the egalitarian/anti-feminist movement. My attention was first captured by her due to this video where she talks about the attack of her friend/former co-star and rape culture. She is exceedingly intelligent, beautiful, and has a great sense of humor. There were so many questions I had for her and she agreed to answer them. I'm glad she was so open and honest for this interview as these are things people need to hear. 21 questions in full, half are serious anti-feminist issues (mostly on the topic of how feminists view sex and porn and her thoughts on that) and half are just random off the wall questions because I didn't want the entire interview to be so downer and depressing. Hope you all enjoy!

1. How do you feel about the feminist idea that all porn is rape? Obviously only the women are being raped (as they don’t seem to include male/male porn) 

The current (sex negative) feminist idea that porn is rape seems to be rooted in several things. The first is that the “matriarchs” of this subculture are uncomfortable with themselves, and their sexuality, and they are projecting that onto the world around them. The other, very base, motivation for their disinterest in porn comes from the fear of competition. Women, historically, have competed with one another for resources (which for eons were provided by men). Many of the sex-negative radical feminists you’re seeing these days are women who are wholly uncompetitive in that market thus would rather destroy the market than challenge themselves into being competitive.

These same women are unrealistic about the way the world, and biology, works. They think by eliminating markets it will eliminate the urges cis men have. As repressive societies where porn is banned have proven (and rape culture is the norm) it’s simply not the case.  

To trivialize rape by likening it to consenting adults having sex on camera is most offensive. Much of this comes from the Dworkin theory of feminism (a woman who was gravely disturbed and likely abused herself). In this insane ideology, ALL men are rapists if they stick their penises in women. And due to this self perpetuating victimhood the Dworkinites have created, they see all women as repressed victims of patriarchy. Clearly, this has more to do with Dworkin and her perception of the world than the reality of human sexuality, but unfortunately this faulty belief system is still being perpetuated, even in academia.  

The reason they omit male/male porn from discussion is in this context they not only censor themselves due to the “progressive stack” which they adhere to, but they also are disinterested in the topic as a whole as it gives them no means to self aggrandize and proliferate the story of women as victims.

2. Many people believe that women that go into porn do so because they were abused or neglected as children (Daddy issues and that whole thing). If it’s not too personal to ask do you have any sort of issues like that? Or no more or less than anyone else? Do you think this is a huge factor in your experience? (I personally think to some extent everyone has issues with their parents just some are worse than others right?) 

There was a study done that found that sex workers have no greater incidence of molestation than secretaries. Those numbers alone help to dispel the myth of the “damaged” sex worker.  The “daddy issues” assertion is a way for SWERF feminists to invalidate the experiences of women like myself who might oppose their overbearing ideology. 

On a personal note, I was much closer with my father than with my mother, and as a result from a young age learned to like and respect men. It was my father who taught me how to change a tire, work on an engine, play chess, read esoteric literature and many other interests I’ve retained to this day. I was neither babied, nor pandered to. In fact I was treated just as a son might have been treated (which is perhaps why I am an egalitarian to this day.) In other words, I learned competence from my father. If anything, my experiences as a sex worker and porn actress have been positive and fulfilling BECAUSE I have a positive association with men from an early age. 

It is not unusual that MANY of the women who are porn actresses and sex workers are much more competent, in general, than your typical ivory tower Ivy League SWERF feminist academic. Unlike the sheltered existence they live (from which they formulate inaccurate theories about the lives of working class women), sex workers as a whole are leaps and bounds more pragmatic and realistic. 

3. Do you enjoy having sex, and I mean on and off the job? I only ask because a lot of feminists hold the idea that women can’t possibly enjoy it or it’s wrong to enjoy such a thing? 

I’ve always enjoyed sex, and I’ve always been a sexual person. I’ve been measured as having higher than normal testosterone, so perhaps that’s why. I also enjoy the physicality of the experience. For me, porn sex is an exercise in sex, fitness and aesthetic. It’s a real challenge to be able to act sex, have sex well, perform it well, and also look good doing it! 

4. What are your thoughts on the whole “women can’t ever consent” even if they totally are consenting? As some feminists believe that women are brainwashed into consenting by society? 

The infantilized viewpoint from which anti-sex feminists see women is what I find most offensive of all. They incessantly whine about the need for equality, all the while contending that women are inherently in need of protection. Now, I actually agree that women are biologically weaker (pound for pound that is simply true), but I also believe modern women to be competent enough to create solutions and wise enough to keep themselves out of harm’s way. 

The other part of this is the remaining Dworkinite belief that all men are oppressors/rapists/violent etc. This is one of the most absurd parts of their philosophy and show that their ideology is not about liberating women, but about vilifying men. The most problematic (to use their jargon) part of this is the complete disdain they show young men. These days on college campuses we are seeing men convicted before they’ve even had an opportunity to defend themselves.  The radfems are literally overstepping due process because they feel women should be privileged. What they don’t understand about this is that NOBODY is oppressing them. Western society is and has been the best place and time to be a woman for the whole of human history. At this point they are creating boogeymen where none exist and harming young men’s lives in the process. I fear that the (false) cries of “rape culture” have become a witch hunt and many good young men will be metaphorically burned at the stake for it. 

5. Did you ever feel like porn was your only option? That you had to be “objectified” to get somewhere in life? Or was this a conscious choice you made based on the fact that you like this occupation? 

No, porn was not and is not my only option. It happens to be the most pragmatic and profitable option, but it was not a last resort. On the contrary, I did my first scene partially as a bucket list item to check off, partially as a curiosity and also as a fun life experience. When I stepped onto a porn set, I realized it is basically just a mainstream set but with sex as the content. My first scene was very easy for me, and it is so profitable I figured I’d continue as a part time porn star. However, after signing with a big agency (who originally figured due to my age I’d work maybe 3-4 times a month) I found myself working almost daily for the first few months. I fell in love with the industry and the people and just continued taking the work. It was never my intention to be a “full time” porn actress (many of the performers only do porn part time actually) but it became a full time career. 

Before working in porn I worked my share of corporate jobs (in engineering and technology), and also worked in mainstream film production. Many of the people in the porn industry also work in mainstream, but everyone tries to keep the work separate. Contrary to popular belief, the mainstream tv/film industry is very discriminatory towards those of us who work in porn. 

Regarding objectification, I felt more objectified when I was told I had to work a set schedule (even as a salaried employee) by a multinational corporation that treated its employees as expendable commodities. On the contrary, on a porn set the actresses are often pandered to and handled with kid gloves. I don’t require such treatment, but was amazed at how well we are treated generally. As far as fans objectifying porn actresses, that is part of the territory in theory, but in fact what I’ve found out about male sexuality is that women are not objectified but more often personalized by the viewer. Meaning, men who view porn actually don’t view us as objects, but desire us as beautiful women who they’d like to be desired by. It’s no accident that in most of pornography a common focal point is on the actresses face. While genital shots are taken, they are not as popular as the shots of the actress enjoying herself. If anyone is truly objectified in porn, it is the male performer, as often he is not shown as a human at all, just an erect penis on a body. This is where rad-fems who claim porn objectifies women out themselves for judging media without viewing the content. 

6. How do you feel about the whole “MILF” thing. For instance another actress I’m a huge fan of as she’s gotten older has been cast many times as a MILF (not for porn it's mostly comedies/sitcoms) would you consider it a sexist insult or a compliment? 

Much of the work I do is in the MILF genre, and I’m proud of it! Unlike the modern feminist, who desires to be thought of as a “pure” delicate maiden her whole life (and is thus in arrested development as a result of her delusions), the MILF genre allows for a kind of psycho-social sexual development of women. In the archetype theory of stages of development, women go through 3 phases: maiden, mother and crone.  Jung did wonderful work exploring these archetypes, but essentially the maiden is the pure, untouched, fragile and delicate stage of a girl to young woman, and her dark (shadow) aspects are that of frivolity, shallowness and vanity. The mother embodies the fullness of motherhood, the robust sexuality and fertility of a woman in her prime, and the care-taking and tenderness the mother should show.  The shadow of the mother is conniving, jealous, hateful, spiteful and cruel (which is the archetype often embodied in fairy tales as the “step mother”).  The crone embodies the wisdom that only a full life well lived can bring, and a compassion and understanding for youth, society, and the planet. Her shadow aspect is that of cynicism, condemnation, and isolation (again, often portrayed in fairy tales as the “mean old witch”). 

Much of the failing of women in modern society is the lack of development into stages beyond that of maidenhood. Feminists blame “patriarchy” for women seeking eternal youth through pop culture, but I actually think the popularity of the MILF genre proves their theory wrong. It is, in fact, their addiction to their own youth and fragility that leads them to not progress. Most modern feminists do not and will not embrace the “mother” in all her glory as the mother archetype has a love for men as protectors and partners. They do not embrace the crone as she has the wisdom to not blame a gender for the faults of humanity. There is much ado about “new age” philosophies that superficially explore these archetypes within the feminist circles, but they are not willing to delve into the shadow aspects of these archetypes and do their own personal work to discover they are blaming what exists outside of themselves for what they create within. 

Women today are solely to blame for not cultivating wisdom within themselves and passing it down to their daughters. As a result, we see many of the baby boomer generation especially have not psychologically aged as their bodies have and they are stuck in a state of attempting for eternal youthfulness. Without nurturing and wisdom, the development of the female archetypes has nothing to offer beyond maidenhood. Do you see now why feminists feel they are being dismissed? It is their own lack of psychologically development that has left them unfit to contribute to societal discourse in a meaningful way, and par for the course of the shadow maiden, they cannot see how it is their own doing.  Many are also malcontent at the fact that they were not sexually desirable to men due to their looks/appearance, but it’s easier to blame men or the patriarchy boogeyman than it is to be honest with themselves about where they’ve not developed fully as human beings.

For me personally, as I’ve chosen to examine my own psyche as an ongoing project, age has only improved my quality of life and I still very much enjoy that I am considered to be sexually desirable. However, I’m honest and realistic about the phases of human life, and there will be a day when I’m no longer desirable. A well developed mind (a wise old crone) has no need for such adulation when the time for such things is past. 

7. What are your thoughts on BDSM? Do you believe it’s empowering for women? Do you believe that women being submissive in any way promotes rape/rape culture? 

Regarding BDSM- I believe the experience of BDSM is wholly personal for the people engaging in it. Within that subculture there’s a tremendous amount of nuance, and so many varieties of the rules of engagement. A well trained Dominant will create a space of safety for a Submissive to play out their fantasies. I believe all BDSM play is only as good as the psychological development of the actors within it, so I always encourage people to do their own introspective work before committing to such an arrangement full time. I do not think it promotes rape or rape culture; in fact, I don’t think “rape culture” exists in the west currently, outside of extreme Muslim circles anyway. I am not the most knowledgeable person in regards to BDSM, this is just my subjective experience of it, but I know many people who are quite well regarded in that world and facilitate it as a means for healing and progress. 

8. How do you feel about fantasy role-play, or porn movies with simulated rape or other activities? I know there are porn movies where the women are of consenting age (legal adults) but via makeup and other effects they age the women down to look much younger than 18. Do you believe any of this promotes child pornography or rape or do you think it’s still fantasy and okay as long as adults are consenting to the activities? 

Fantasy is just that- fantasy. It is created because it exists in the mind of a human, somewhere. Jung would call them disowned desires and thoughts. The issue with disowning pieces of yourself is they gain power by being relegated to the “disallowed” section of the brain.  Fantasy role play, videos etc created by consenting adults enacting these fantasies creates a kind of pressure release valve for those disowned desires. I’d much rather people watch fantasy role play with adult actresses dressed as teens than for people to seek child pornography where real exploitation took place. Disowned desires aren’t generally chosen by the holder of them, which is why often people view such taboo material in secret and private. Of course, if one is desiring to harm others without their consent, it’s always good to visit a therapist to see if doing some psychological work might address the issue at it’s root cause. However, some of the fantasies are truly just that, and it’s the taboo of them that makes it erotic. 

Interesting thing about rape pornography- the fantasy of rape is actually much more common in women than in men. Meaning, more women are turned on by the idea of rape than men are. This proves that a fantasy isn’t necessarily desired in the real world by the holder of it. Again, it’s the taboo of it that is the turn on. The reason more rape porn isn’t made is it’s simply not popular with men. Most of the popular categories that men watch/search for are much more benign: big butt, big boob, MILF, teen, interracial. And in most of the pornography made for men, it is the woman who is the sexual aggressor, whether she’s a MILF or teen. Big shock- men are most turned on by the idea that a woman *desires* them. Again this runs contrary to the constant harping of SWERFs that men desire to be the enactors of a patriarchal rape culture.  Most men actually want to be desired by the women in their fantasies. Even rape porn often ends with the woman having orgasmed. 

9. Do you think sex/rape jokes in any way cause rape or allow people to think rape is okay/funny? Should comedians who tell rape jokes be apologetic? (Such as the sort of infamous Daniel Tosh incident which he never apologized for) If you know what happened there do you think he should apologize? (Source for people who don't know)

I believe comedy should not be PC and comedians should not be forced to apologize. Rape is not something I take lightly (as evidenced by my video regarding Cytherea), but I believe EVERY topic can and should be fodder for the jesters of our generation. Comedy has an important place in a free society- it provides a space where no topic is off limits and no actor is out of bounds. Traditionally, the court jester was the only one in court who could openly tease and deride the royalty. This is an important function, as it humbled those who feel beyond reproach and it allows the masses to joke at the expense of their masters. To see feminists now attempting to censor comedians, it is clear which group believes they are beyond reproach and should be the ruling party in all matters of social intercourse. 

10. There are porn stars, rather former porn stars, who have come out against the porn industry saying they were forced into doing things they never wanted to do and were coerced. They are now condemning porn and feminists love to use them as poster children for why all porn is rape. How do you feel about this?

The porn industry now is very different than it used to be, I’ve been told. I’ve also been told it’s the same now as it always was. When porn became legal, it became regulated. This is a good thing for performer safety and also turned the porn industry into another corporatized business as opposed to the rogue entity people still envision it is. It’s no Boogie Nights now, we don’t do drugs on set, and we sign consent forms before and after our scenes. We have the right to call CUT at any time, and we can consent or decline to work with whatever talent we choose. There have been a few rogue porn producers who have been disparaging to talent, but it’s few and far between. The bigger production houses are quite careful due to fear of litigation and general concern for performer safety. 

Many of the ex-porn stars who have painted themselves as victims are women who did not achieve the stardom they hoped and don’t have the intestinal fortitude to deal with the repercussions of choosing a socially controversial career. If you’ve been a well known porn actress, you may not be allowed to work with children. You may be judged at Sunday school (many of the “reformed” actresses become Evangelical Christians). This is all par for the course in choosing such a controversial job. Some get used to the quick cash and blow it all on an extravagant lifestyle and drug habit. Instead of being responsible for their own life choices, they take the shadow maiden route and blame the world for the life they’ve lived. No surprise that many radical feminists find so much in common with these ex-porn actresses, right? 

Further, there are a few in particular who have cooked up quite a scam by being “victimized” ex porn stars. Shelly Lubben, in particular, takes girls out of the industry (many of whom have a drug habit) and helps them to “find” Jesus. She then markets to that star’s fan base to send donations to help the performer. Shelly then keeps all the donations made to her “saved” girls for herself, and also disallows the performers access to the outside world. She is much more abusive and coercive to these performers than the industry ever was. So, not everything is as it seems from the outside, but those hell bent on vilifying porn will listen intently to even the most transparent charlatan. 

[On a side note I had a theory this was probably what had happened more or less and I'm glad to hear it confirmed by someone who actually has more information on it than me]

Random Off The Wall Questions (Cause I'm Cool Like That)

11. I hear that you game/like gaming, any favorite video games? 

I love gaming! My all time favorite is Tetris, although I’m playing GTAV now. 

12. If I told you that you were hot and I would let you slap me around and make me your bitch would you be offended or flattered?

I’d be flattered and make you bend over my knee for a right proper spanking.

13. If you were a peanut butter would you be chunky or smooth? 

I always buy chunky peanut butter, so I’ll go with that! 

14. What’s your favorite movie? Porn or otherwise? Can be any movie at all. 

Oh I have so many favorites. My favorite philosophical movies are The Gladiator and The Mission (both have excellent soundtracks too). I also love Star Wars, Usual Suspects and any sort of mafia movie (especially Goodfellas). 

15. If you could be in a movie with anyone (Porn or otherwise) who would you like to be your co-star? 

If I could get any of the muscle bears in gay porn to be straight for pay I’d be in. Otherwise I work with a lot of hot women all the time that I’d choose. 

16. David Bowie Hot or Not?  *Question Asked In 2015*

Hot, then and now. 

17. Dogs or Cats? 

I love them both but I’m allergic to cats. I think they’re so smart though.

18. Favorite food? 

I’m not much of a foodie to be honest. I like chocolate way too much though. 

19. Favorite band/genre of music?  

Classical, country, rock, EDM. 

20. When I get married, could you attend my wedding and get drunk and make a really bad toast cause that would be awesome! 

Sure! I’d love to embarrass you in front of your family if possible. I can also give you both a spanking, dance inappropriately with your uncle and get kicked out for doing too many Jager shots :)

Bonus question (Because I thought of it right before I sent the e-mail)

21. Have you ever done something in a porn movie you didn't like, as in tried a new kink/fetish and thought "Well that wasn't for me"? If so did you consider it to be rape/violation or did you consider it to be a life experience and you are glad you know now? Also has the opposite happened where you thought you wouldn't like something and ended up loving it? 

I asked a performer who does a lot of Domming work to make me a sub (off camera) because I wanted to have the experience. I found out I do NOT like having my hands restrained, no matter how much I trust the person doing it. For this reason I do not sub, on camera or off. My fight instinct is too strong and I just am uncomfortable being restrained. No violation whatsoever, it was a lesson learned and an experience I asked for. I’m very grateful for it as I didn’t commit to do a scene that I might have regretted or had to pull. 

Super special thanks to Mercedes for answering all my questions the serious and not so serious! Hope to get her for a live interview soon enough. She is an amazing woman and very well spoken and I think it would be great to have a one on one down and dirty conversation with her. I hope you all enjoyed the interview and feel free to give Mercedes some love as well. You can easily find her on twitter to show your support!