Tonight I had a "chat" with a feminist on tumblr. She was reblogging shit with really invalid sources about how Sandra Bland's death was ruled a homicide. I pointed out to her that it absolutely wasn't and she needed to stop reblogging propaganda. I also pointed out to her that the reason the officer was fired in the case wasn't under a murder charge. It was because he lied under oath and he has not been charged (as of yet). Even the article she reblogged didn't have the information she claimed. When I explained to her the actual facts of the Sandra Bland case shit started to get real. Here is the actual transcript with names redacted:
Ok. I was only saying I don't have all the facts yet. Not that I wasn't going to read them or that they didn't exist. There's no reason to be hostile or rude to me.
Why are you reblogging something you don't have all the facts for nor have you read up on yet? This case is like a year old if you are that interested you should read about it. Besides you post a lot of incredibly inaccurate things I just never say anything about it
I see that you are often very hostile to people because they believe there should be equality between women and men. I disagree with many of the things you've said as well, but I do do research on other topics, and when I take a stand on something it's because I believe in it. And please, all I'm asking from you right now is that we have a civil conversation without being rude. (She thinks I'm hostile to people because I'm anti-feminist and I guess against equality? Or something?)
LoL Are you kidding me? Excuse me you think that I'm against equality for what reason now? Oh because I'm anti-feminist. Right. Well explain to me what rights you don't have as a woman in this country. Wage gap isn't real nor is rape culture so don't start with those. We'll move on from there.
Because you say rape culture isn't real, that means it's automatically not real? No I disagree with you.
(I DISAGREE WITH FACTS THEREFORE THEY CAN'T BE REAL!)
Men get sentenced to only months in jail for raping a woman while she's passed out.
(Women get no jail time for falsely accusing men of rape, some women don't even get jail time for raping people, or murdering men but lets ignore that right?)
Men make rape jokes and catcall women all the time thinking they have the right to do that when it scares women.
(They do have a right to make jokes and catcall sorry you hate it but it falls under free speech)
Women have to worry about going out at night, because of the threat of rape, but men don't have those same fears, not to the same degree at least.
(Yeah they only have to worry about violent assault and murder but whatever, also no one rapes men and it's not at all common)
And then there's just little societal things like the fact that women are more likely to have mechanics try to take advantage of them, because they think they don't know anything about vehicles.
(And men who look like an easy sale never get taken advantage of? Also isn't it a fucking privilege to be able to buy a fucking car? How in the goddamn world is this part of rape culture. Further more if you ALREADY know this can't you just prepared for it when you go in to buy your privileged ass a car?)
There are many inequalities in society today, and I disagree with your argument that there aren't. Once again, please don't be sarcastic or hostile simply because I have different views than you.
(Sarcastic/Hostile is pointing out she's wrong I guess? Also being annoyed that once again a feminist thinks I'm anti-equality because I'm also anti-feminist)
Okay well you have opinions and I have facts. Do you know what RAINN.org is? They are the national organization for rape statistics. Recently they put out a plea for everyone to stop using the term rape culture because we don't live in a rape culture. Yes I can source this. So a national organization who collects these statistics is not factual and that makes me wrong? It's not sarcasm I'm just wondering why those people of all people would say that if we do live in a rape culture? Further more if we lived in a rape culture then we wouldn't even have a word for rape because it would be legal and no one would be punished. Can you explain to me where people are being taught to rape anyone? I mean where does this exist?
Further more men fear a shit ton going out by themselves at night. Know why? Men are most likely to be victims of violent crimes, assaults, and murders. WAY more so than women. And lets talk about the fact that until recently (2013 to be exact) the legal definition of rape in this country as defined by the FBI was something that only a man could do to a woman. They only just changed it 3 years ago. Do you know why the definition of rape was that? Because of feminist theory. In 1973 feminist theory dictated that rape could only be done by penetration of a penis. Is that fair? I didn't think so. But it doesn't matter anyway because still the laws imply heavily that only men can rape.
They are biased towards women. Also lets look at the women who have recently lied about rape, gotten famous for it, were proved liars, and got in absolutely no trouble when filing a false police report is a crime. If we lived in a rape culture would any of this be allowed? You know what an actual rape culture is? It's Saudi Arabia, it's India, it's 3rd world countries. It's not where you live. So yeah I'd like to hear you debate all of that. (Source I sent her) And FYI I'm a victim of three separate sexual assaults and I still wouldn't call this a rape culture
I am not denying that it's shitty that men are often made fun of and not treated fairly when it comes to them being raped. I do know that rapists are the reason people are raped. What I and many other people are trying to say is that rapists are often given excuses for their actions by today's culture.
(Where? Who does this? Who is excusing this behavior? Pull 100 random men off the street and I'd bet you that all 100 of them will not excuse raping a girl)
That is what the phrase rape culture means to me.
(Okay GREAT but what it means to you is factually incorrect bullshit, what part of that don't you get?)
Victim blaming is a real problem. There are so many times when people say "well was she drinking? Did she lead him on? What was she wearing?" Like that makes it ok that she was harassed.
(Once again 99.9% of people would not EVER say it's okay to rape a girl because she's drunk, where the fuck is she getting this idea?)
"Rape culture" doesn't make people want to rape people, but it does make rapists feel they have an excuse and less of a chance of getting in trouble.
(No this literally isn't happening anywhere. Rapists just RAPE people. Including female rapists which you so easily glossed the fuck over)
Do you not understand that rapists literally do not care about the law? Please, find me one guy off of the street right now who will flat out tell you it's okay to rape a girl because she got drunk. I'll wait because it's going to take you a long time. Wouldn't that prove that no one is excusing this behavior? Not to mention the fact that women aren't ever to blame at all? I agree no one has the right to rape anyone which BTW men are taken advantage of regularly when they are drunk by other women which no one ever talks about but does happen. However asking a person to examine their behavior leading up to a crime isn't victim blaming. It's asking someone to examine their behavior. It's not saying they deserved to be raped. However here's the thing. Regret sex isn't rape, if a woman can't consent while drunk neither can a man yet in a situation where a woman and a man are drunk and the woman claims rape he goes to jail. is that fair? because legally he couldn't consent either and they are both victims. If anything that proves that there is a bias towards excusing victims of male rape.
Further more, guess what. Women are making a CHOICE to go out, a CHOICE to get drunk, and a CHOICE to behave irresponsibly. If a girl goes out, doesn't drink herself shit faced BY HER OWN CHOICE (Which BTW Alcohol willingly consumed is the number one drug that facilitates rape) then you know she wouldn't leave herself open to be raped. Same with a man who that happens to. If a woman left the keys in a running car and went in a store and her car was stolen would you not think that was stupid? No one is saying that she deserves to have her car stolen because she did that, but her poor judgement in that situation led to her car being stolen and yeah EVERYONE is going to point that out because that's a stupid thing to do. That's far different from parking your car, locking it, and doing all the right things while also having it stolen. In both cases the woman is the victim however in one of those situations the woman behaved exceedingly poor, showed horrible judgement, and had she locked her car she wouldn't have gotten it stolen. IN NO WAY IS ANYONE SAYING SHE DESERVES TO BE A VICTIM IT'S AWFUL but guess what, the criminal literally doesn't give a shit it's illegal to steal cars no matter how much you tell him that he's not supposed to do that and yeah it's perfectly fine to point out WHY she was stupid this isn't the same as victim blaming. If anything pointing out how dumb she was will help her learn "Hey maybe I don't leave my car running while I go in a store" Not to mention that if you REALLY don't want to have sex alcohol doesn't take away your ability to tell a guy no. Sorry it doesn't. You have to literally be PASSED THE FUCK OUT for your consent to be taken away. I've been trashed off my ass 1000 times and STILL been able to tell guys "NO" when they asked for sex. Being DRUNK isn't even an excuse.
At this point she blocked me because apparently she couldn't answer anything after this. Because I guess according to her I was being intentionally hostile and/or a troll as this is the post she put on her blog after she blocked me and went to sleep:
First of all I was WAY more polite than I usually am with fucktards of this level. Secondly I don't think it would matter how much I sugar coated anything, she didn't like what I was saying. Finally, and most important, what I'm saying is backed up by facts. It's backed up by RAINN.Org. It's backed up by actual crime statistics and studies. No matter what she wants to think, her OPINION isn't fact. Now if you noticed I never said she couldn't have her OPINION. I literally said "You have an opinion and I have facts". She can have all her stupid opinions she wants but that doesn't make her better and my facts don't make me a troll. I honestly wonder how people like her survive in the world with such a high level victim "WOE IS ME CAUSE I'M A WOMAN" Complexes. Whatever. Hopefully she doesn't breed because the last thing we need is more of her.